. It's No Secret Anymore By Jerry Walters MTT Contributing Writer Member of the Golf Writers Association of America Ladies, pay attention to this! Golf is a game or honor, integrity and manners, but only when you're within earshot. References to the ladies' game and lack of power are as common as broken tees on the driving range. I'm certain the fairer sex has heard them all by now as the men inadvertently blurted out quips forgetting a woman was in their group. The majority of the disparaging slurs refer to one's putting talents, as that element of the game is inexcusable. Only once per hole does the entire foursome reattach itself, on the green. The insults and jokes during the ritual of reading greens and conceding putts are endless. "Nice shot, Alice" is most commonly heard when a shot with the flat stick comes up short. These days, the phrase points out a weak effort, but originally it referred to Peter Aliss' game, which had become woefully average. On occasion, any other female name may be substituted. Nearly every one of the insults about a male's ability to strike the putt to an acceptable distance refers to his manhood. "Does your husband play?" indicates you'll be putting again before the rest of your group lines theirs up. Strike a putt that requires you to hit again before you're inside your partner, and the question "Hard to putt in high heels?" is likely to be asked. "Skirt fly up?" is especially degrading to the putter without much pace on his shot. As you may conclude, the female golfer is relatively thought of as a lower species in golf. One standard comment that you ladies may have never been, pardon the pun, exposed to, is what the so-called gentlemen casually refer to as the FORT WORTH rule. When four male golfers are gathered on a remote tee and one of the foursome dribbles his drive so weakly that the ball fails to reach the women's tee markers, an obscure provision know as the FORT WORTH rule comes into effect. Thinking of the comic brilliance of the collective male mind, the FORT WORTH rule requires the player who struck the pitiful shot to immediately display his so-called manhood, for what it's worth, to the rest of the foursome. This is done to verify to all within visible distance that although this person may be struggling to advance the ball to a length satisfactory to his cronies, and at times, he hits the ball like a woman, he is, in fact, in possession of male genitalia. For all the years I've played the game of golf, and the numerous times the FORT WORTH rule has been threatened to be imposed, I've, thankfully, never seen it carried out. Obvious questions arise. Why is the punishment for this crime so stiff? Who dictates the rule? Which golfer was ever so half-cocked to conjure up the rule? And, over the years, why has this law never petered out? But, the most curious question that plagues the mind of these ingenious gentleman golfers is this, why FORT WORTH? Why not St. Petersburg, Fort Dix, or Johnsonville? Jerry Walters is co-host of Chip Shots, heard every Saturday morning from 6am- 8am on 950 AM The Fan. Be sure to check out the web site at chipshotsradio.com.